Fart Etiquette?

Is there proper etiquette for breaking wind?  Is there any place in public where it is okay to let loose and relieve yourself of abdominal air pressure?

The interesting thing about flatulence is that everyone has it.  There is not a single person on this earth that does not fart.  Granted, some more than others, however the fact remains that everyone has gas seeping from their anus.

Why then, if this is one of the few things that all human beings have in common, is it something that we frown upon doing in public?  Being a thing of biology and mother nature, shouldn't we accept this in each other as common ground?  Why shouldn't this be a thread upon which to weave the blanket that holds us together and keeps us warm as a world-wide united people?

Well, it's odiferous for one.  We don't like smelling other people's odors or hearing their bodily functions.  So we shun these activities to the underground, only letting them surface when we are alone and free of judgment and criticism.

Ironically, we feel okay about laughing at fart jokes, but we don't think it's very funny when the stranger next to us lets one rip.

I recently discovered that there are a lot of guys whom think it's okay to fart in a public restroom when there are other people around.  I'm not talking about the guys sitting on the toilet trying to pinch a loaf.  It's inevitable that they're going to let one go whether they're trying to or not.  I'm talking about guys standing at the urinals taking care of business and even guys at the sink washing their hands.

It's like walked through the door and were handed a free-fart pass and cut loose.  Now I understand that we all have needs that have to be addressed, but I never fart in the bathroom unless there are no people in there.  Why can we socially ban audible public farting and yet have it be okay just because you're in the bathroom?

If you were standing next to the same person outside of the bathroom, you wouldn't fart, but now that you're through the door it becomes okay to cut the cheese while you're peeing?  This doesn't make sense to me.  Why do people feel okay doing this?

Isn't it bad enough that I have to stand next to you while you're holding your penis and I am holding mine?  Now I have to smell your ass too?  Could there be a more awkward social situation? 

Seriously, hold it in pal.  Hang out for a minute.  When I'm done taking a piss you'll be alone and you can spread your cheeks and blow.